Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Dear Big Apple Angie, Part 2

Dear Big Apple Angie,

Why do guys rely on texting/IMing/Facebook messaging girls instead of picking up the freaking phone and calling??

Tired of Technology in Tulsa

Dear Tired of Technology in Tulsa,

It’s a question faced by many savvy women in today’s world of ever-changing technology. What did we do back in the day before there were 13 different ways to stay in touch? I, for one, have only recently forayed into the text-messaging arena and I'm definitely not a proponent, though I do love the MySpace, the Facebook, etc. What guys don't always realize is that none of those are an adequate substitute for actual conversation. I’m not nearly as loquacious as I was in my formative years, (shout out Central Christian School!) but say there was a cute boy who wanted to talk to me on the phone: I would be okay with that. So back to the question: why is it so hard for boys to "reach out and touch someone" these days?

To give credit to the dudes: if a guy is really interested in you, using technology to communicate gives him more time to come up with witty quips and funny messages. After all, he wants to make you laugh and to impress you. Imagine if he told you a stupid joke and it bombed... awkward silence... how quickly would you hang up, three-way call your gal-pals and collectively decide that he’s a total bonehead? It happens all the time.

The bottom line is, to men, communication is communication. They don't differentiate between technological or telephonic, verbal or via webcam. Just feel fortunate if he doesn't use your Facebook wall to propose.

In the early stages of a relationship – cut your honey some slack. He’s just trying to make you think he’s clever and funny. However, if your husband will only MySpace message you, there are definitely deeper issues at hand. Feel free to send a follow up question if that is the case.

Big Apple Angie


Anonymous said...

Dear Big Apple Angie,

What's a girl to do if the guy she wants to be with forever isn't working now? And the guy she's with now won't work forever?

Anonymous said...

This is totally true. I think it's just the easy accessibility of it, and avoiding the awkwardness of not having to hold an entire conversation. Guys get out what they need to say and that's that. Case in point: Most of my current law school relationships have sprung from facebook flirting. As long as it eventually develops into phone or in-person communication, that's fine with me...