Warning: you are about to read the very last blog entry covering an actual date. You may be thinking, “She said she was going to go on 10 dates. What a Venti liar.” Well, given the rubbish I had to sort through to get to these seven dates (which seem more like a dozen) and given all the drama that has ensued in my life since March, I just couldn’t stomach any more horrid or mediocre dates. Plus, the aforementioned dross that I had to sort through took a LOT of time. Between responding to emails from potential suitors to determine compatibility to just reading through the asinine “winks” and brainless remarks from morons, I was headed for a Lohan/Spears-esque meltdown.
But fear not! My date with Adam was a kazillion times better than all the other dates combined. Of course I went into it thinking, “Okay, here we go. An hour at Starbucks and I’m outta there.” Well, nine hours, a movie, a Skeeball tournament and an exorbitantly pricey dinner later, and I thought, “Hmm, maybe all boys aren’t stupid. I shall temporarily cease hurling rocks at them.”
Truly, Adam was a sweet guy and we had a lot of fun, though I fear he felt a wee bit emasculated when I dominated him at the Dave & Buster’s trivia game. It’s quite possible that I am the fastest person to ever play the game, so he shouldn’t take it personally. No one could beat me, not even Jeopardy champ Ken Jennings. In fact, I won enough tickets to buy a small kitchen appliance, or like, 967 super long pixie sticks. MMM, sugar!
But I digress. Adam had to take a 90-minute train ride to NYC to see me, so it’s no surprise we crammed the equivalent of four dates into one. We had actually spoken by phone prior to our date, which I normally refuse to do (See To Date or Not to Date, Part 6.) I rationalized that since Adam was a suburbanite, it would be tricky for him to stalk me. Consequentially I broke with protocol and gave him my number in advance.
As mentioned, we ate a delightful dinner at a Brazilian steakhouse in Midtown. You all know I’m a sucker for all-you-can-eat grilled meat skewers, and this place totally blew my mind. Then we went to see “Blades of Glory” - yes, I actually saw it twice in theaters. And despite my ice cold heart (rivaled only by that of everyone's favorite frigid Ukrainian - Oksana Bayul), I was starting to actually warm up to a guy! Will wonders never cease?!
About a month later, Adam came back and we went out again… to Dave & Buster’s and Central Park. It was a beautiful day and we ate ice cream -TWICE in one day. What a catch, that Adam. I might have to set him up with one of my friends.
As I said, this is my last date I’m writing about, and for that I humbly request your forgiveness. However, the most titillating portion of the social experiment blog series is yet to come! Stay tuned this week for snarky commentary... admit it, that's what you're here for!
Orlando from a Hot Air Balloon
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