Friday, September 25, 2009

Official Orthapalooza 2009 Recap

I know I said I'd lay off the ellipses, but I'm taking it back. They work for me! Here's a zippy, ellipses-filled download of Orthapalooza '09.

Thursday: get no sleep due to overexcitement about Disney... WORK... ahhh, the soothing ambiance of JFK... try to relax on plane... Korean immigrant seatmate asks, "Are you a student?"... "No, I'm a grown-up. Yes, I'm on my way to Disney World. For fun." ... give parenting advice to seatmate...he says, "You're a special person, Angie"... arrive on time for once... Mom & Hodgie are lost en route to MCO... my advice, "Look up. See planes? Go to there"... déjà vu, "Why is it Mom always sucks at navigating out of airports?"... arrive at Disney's Key West Resort... Rae & Dad are sleeping, some warm welcome... jump on top of RaeRae in bed and shake her awake, "It's Disney time!!!! Wakey-wakey!!!!"... "I hate you so much right now, Ange"... shower... 2 a.m. ... attempt to sleep...

Friday: lie awake in bed for an hour... go into the living room to watch Phinneaus & Ferb... back to bed... 5 a.m. ... in bed next to sleeping RaeRae, Ange starts to sing, "When you wish upon a star, make no difference who you are!" ... RaeRae says, "Are you KIDDING me?! Shut up!" ... Mom makes bacon & eggs in the kitchen... depart for Magic Kingdom on complimentary Disney buses... arrive... Cinderella's castle comes into sight... swoon... skip and frolic down Mainstreet USA - yes, we really frolicked... take 50 pictures in the first 10 minutes in the park... chart the most efficient and effective course of action, first stop Tomorrowland... Buzz Lightyear ride, crowd favorite... is it time for an ice cream bar yet?... on to Fantasyland, and the teacups... "Let's reenact that home video where we went super fast and made 3-year-old RaeRae really dizzy"... bad, bad, bad idea... who knew a teacup could fly at warp speed when driven by Hodgie?... "Let's do it again!"... again, a bad idea... sing 'it's a small world after all' in creepy child voice... point out various cultural & geographical items of interest on ride... Frontierland... finally, the Mickey ice cream bar I've been dreaming of... almost no lines for Haunted House, Splash & Thunder Mountains... Mom grabs Dad's arm from behind on Haunted Mansion, scares the mess out of him... ride Thunder twice in a row... upon exiting, Disney castmember says, "You wanna go again? Go to the front of the line!"... this never happens... disappointed El Pirata y El Perico taco stand is not open, settle for Pecos Bill's... Pirates of the Caribbean sing-along... 'We wants the redhead!'... get best spot ever for 3 p.m. parade... "Wow, we've never sat right on the curb before!"... depart for best meal ever at Ohana's... ukulele playing lady wants Hodgie in a bad way... "Oh, you can hold my ukulele even though it was $5,000. I think you can handle it, handsome!"... head to Night of Joy at Disney's Hollywood Studios... too tired for fun... Star Tours? More like Crap Tours... "Mom, can we please go home and sleep?"... oh, how the tables have turned...


Saturday: finally, a little more sleep... catching up on the balcony, feeding the friendly duck a cookie... "What's that burning smell?"... THE BACON!... forget breakfast... arrive at Epcot in drizzling rain wearing the sexiest of ponchos... starving from no breakfast... should we eat now or eat in Mexico, or wait until we get to France?... decision: peanut butter cups for a breakfast snack... family concert on the African bongo drums... "Should we put a hat out for tips?"... churros dipped in queso in Mexico... dumplings and eggrolls in China... let's taste the sake in Japan... yet another bad, bad idea... "Gahhhh, is this rubbing alcohol?!"... gag our way through Asia... what's with the troll ride in Norway? That's all they've got there?... oh look, it's the benches Dad welded 25 years ago... let's stop and take pictures of them AGAIN... ham & cheese croissants and pastries in France... "Mom, you could have come to real France with us, you know"... Soarin'... stupid imagination ride with Figment... "If I had known that stupid Figment doll of ours came from this stupid ride, I would have thrown it out a long time ago"... dinner at the Grand Floridian... back to Night of Joy... stand in line forever for the AMAZING Aerosmith Rock and Rollercoaster... kinda dizzy... another Buzz Lightyear ride, but way better than the one at Magic Kingdom... except for that kid standing so close to Hodgie in line, they could have been wearing the same shirt ... impressive American Idol experience, family divided on which performer to vote for... check out the band Family Force 5 because RaeRae likes them... absolutely blown away... most high energy performance I've ever seen in my life... "Can we please go to bed now, Mom? It's past midnight!"

Sunday: Naaaaaaaaa-si-vanyeeaaa-mamameeseeekama-wenyahuh... off to Animal Kingdom... "Should we bring the ponchos?"... "Nah, looks pretty sunny"... descend bus 200 yards from entrance... rain violently DUMPS out of the sky... soaking wet... about those ponchos... critter safari... river rapids ride... again, where are the ponchos... "RaeRae, make your monkey noise!"... "Ooooh-oooh-ahhha-ahhhh!!!"....oooh, let's go on the Mt. Everest roller coaster... free fast passes for all of us!... lots of screaming... Hodgie says, "Let me ooooooooofffffffff!"... dino land ride is scarier than you think... Lion King presentation brings down the house... love those tumbling monkeys... back to Ohana's for dinner - it's just that delicious... banana bread pudding with vanilla sauce for dessert... back to villa... laundry and packing for business trip tomorrow...

...sad to say goodbye to the Wonderful World of Disney, definitely our best trip to Orlando ever in the history of trips to Orlando.

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